In fact, by writing this post, I am mom judging. Somebody had to do it, though, right?
I’ve done it unintentionally. You’ve done it unintentionally. Millions have done it intentionally behind the ego-booster that is social media. You’ve judged another mom before. Yeah it’s me again with another oh-so-controversial post, but you guys are used to my flavor by now, right? Maybe it was a comment you made to yourself. Perhaps it was something you whispered to your other mom friends while on a play date. But if you said it to that mom, she would’ve been offended. Why do we do this? Well, I’ve come to a couple of conclusions that I think answer the question (judge away).
Parenting is hard. With every solution we find to one of our children’s many feats in life, we feel victorious.
There was something that worked for us, so it’s natural for us to think, “they should try it that way.” Whether it is choosing how to feed our newborn, private vs. public school, or wrangling in hormone-crazed teenagers. It doesn’t have to be blatant. It could be something as simple as “have you tried (whatever the solution is that you tried)?” That simple statement can be heard as “you’re not trying hard enough” or “you’re doing it wrong.” And then BOOM, you’re judging!
Some parents are cyber bullies.
For whatever reason, social media seems to be one of the most hypocritical topics when it comes to the family unit. No matter how many times we preach to our kids about watching what they say and do on the Internet, we don’t watch what we say and do. What happened to “if you don’t have anything nice to say don’t say anything at all?” Some comments are unnecessary, and they make you look mean (pre-k vocab for the win). If something doesn’t resonate with you as a parent or you can’t relate to it, it’s okay to keep on scrolling. Pass it up, dismiss it, ignore it, like it because you’re sarcastic. But, whatever you do, don’t say anything! That mom (or dad) shared because they needed to, not so you could spread your negativity into their world.
I’m judging moms (or dads) who judge just by writing this post! Can’t win for losing, huh?
I guess what I am trying to say is, we all judge. But maybe it’s worth it to step back and instead of drawing conclusions, think to ourselves “maybe there’s a reason that parent said/did that thing.”