Dear Baby Boy,
Today, you turn 1! A day that came way too fast. But, also a day that I have looked forward to from the moment I knew you were coming. Watching you grow and learn over the year has been nothing short of amazing. This year has brought so many fun, wild, silly, scary, emotional, and tough moments. As much as you have grown, changed and learned this year, so have I. Today, as we celebrate you, I am reflecting on what this year has taught me about motherhood.
First, it’s taught me that the internet is not a medical doctor. Of course, I’ve always known this, but it doesn’t stop me from researching each cough or sniffle. Getting sucked down the rabbit hole of research and “what it could be/mean.” Don’t get me wrong, the internet offers lots of helpful tips, fun blogs (shout out to this one in particular), places to post monthly photo updates, places to connect with other mamas, BUT, it does not diagnose, nor I am fairly certain, will it ever! So, if I do nothing else the rest of your life, I promise to stay off the internet and always call the doctor first.
Being your mom has taught me to be bold and not back down when it comes to what we know is the best for you. Even if I doubt myself,, I’ve learned to listen to my gut. I am a mama. Most importantly, I am your mama. And I will always make decisions with your very best interest in mind.
Friends, whether they have kids or not, are even more important in this stage of life. Friends I could go to when I was stressed, needed to vent or just want to sit and sip some wine with. Women who are there in the good and the bad. Who prayed with me when I was worried, who celebrated with me when you met milestones, who brought food or just a hug when I needed it the most. I’ve always valued friendship, but this year especially I’ve learned that I need my “squad” more than ever. I hope as you grow older you learn the true meaning of friendships and the joy that comes with them.
I’ve learned that my house may never be truly clean again. And that is OKAY! I used to be (and still am) an “everything has a place” type. However, since you came along, I’ve learned toys strung from one side of the room to the other, laundry piled high, and dishes in the sink might be a sign of a messy house, but they are NOT a sign of a messy life! So, if the toys don’t make it back in the basket at the end of the night, or the laundry goes a
couple of days week without being folded we will all survive. We are making memories and those are way more important than a clean house anyway!
Most of all, this year has taught me how much I love having the title “Mama.” I have a lot of titles. Wife, daughter, sister, friend, employee, but being YOUR mama is my favorite one of all! You are my greatest treasure. I am so thankful we were chosen to be your parents. You light up our world and have loved every single minute of the last year. We love you beyond all measure. And, I can only hope that I am half the mama that you deserve because, sweet boy, you deserve the very best.
Happy 1st Birthday, HJ! Here’s to you, a year of learning and all the birthdays to come!