I remember being a little kid and loving Disney movies. I mean I loved them. Like every other little girl my age, I loved singing along with the songs and pretending I was a princess myself. Jasmine was always my favorite because she was the only one that looked like me; there weren’t many ethnic princesses when I was growing up. But, I digress.
Anyway, it should go without saying that I couldn’t be happier that my little girls are loving Disney’s princesses now, too. We went through a Cinderella phase and Frozen phase, of course (and I was so happy to let that one go… see what I did there?). Now, we’re onto The Little Mermaid. Ariel’s story has been on repeat in my home; we have a dance party every time “Under the Sea” comes on. But unlike the other Disney movies, The Little Mermaid leaves me with so many questions – ones I never thought of as a kid. I’m seeing it through an adult’s eyes now and I just can’t help but wonder…
- Where’s Ariel’s mom?
- Why didn’t anyone notice Ariel was missing before her debut performance started?
- Why doesn’t she have any mer-friends?
- How did they get a stone statue on board the ship?
- Why is she more fascinated by her new legs than by her newly-formed lady parts?
- What did she do the first time she had to go to the bathroom (especially #2)?
- Why does her hair look so good under water?
- What does Ursula feed her eels to make them so big?
- Why didn’t the chef get fired after destroying the kitchen?
- Isn’t Ariel concerned about getting her wedding dress wet when she hugs King Triton?
- What does Ariel do the first time she gets her monthly “gift?”
- Will her babies be born with fins? Or, half a fin? (Because genetics)
I mean, don’t get me wrong – I realize this is a cartoon and mermaids aren’t exactly “realistic,” but I feel like Disney has left me hanging in so many areas on this one. I may never be the same again.
Thanks a lot, Disney. Thanks a lot.